GAHHHH

tonight my mom woke me up from my nap.... i've been feeling lucky lately if i can squeeze it in somewhere my day...

at first i was a little bothered, until she told me she wanted to take me to target to look for a new bedspread!
wahoo. no objections.

so, to my lovely surprise....we bought a new yellow/white bedspread, turquoise sheets, and a cute little pillow. charming, right? i thought so.

it was really great, because i've been so annoyed of my current bedspread (the one i'm using because my last one got STOLEN in logan. who steals a bedspread? from the laundry room at my aparment...mind you. it was freezing and i wanted to warm it up in the dryer....came back and it was gone-zo). anyways, i haven't wanted to spend money on new bedding.....mainly because i just don't have money for new bedding...so my mommy read my mind and decided she'd get it for me. what a doll. thanks mommy :)


and....there you have it. if you can't sense my excitement through the computer screen.....i'm SO EXCITED TO GET TO PROVO. i'm excited for everything:

grocery shopping----probably one of my favorite things in the world to do....and ohhhh how i've missed it
going to school....?---yup. i'm even excited for classes.
meeting new people.........living at home in college (even for a summer) can be a hard way to meet people
my new apartment
everything.




when i wake up in the morning....i'll be able to say:

ONE. MORE. DAY.

three. more. days.

yayayaya

ahhh life is so great.

i mean, life treats me really well!

i just have one more week of work left before i move to PROVO!

i leave in five days,

and i'm peeing my pants with excitement.

for real.

i can't wait to be there.

i can't wait to just freaking be there!

all i have left to do is find a job.

which i feel good about for some weird reason.

on account of there are TWO universities in the provo area,

and wayyyy more students than utah state...
i shouldn't feel good at all about the job prospects hahah.
but

i just feel like i'll get a job soon!

so umm...keep your fingers crossed for me :)

(just cross them as you read this....that's right....i mean NOW).

i can't waiiiiiiit.

my dad just got a bike we've had in our garage FOREVER

fixed up for me.

and i can't wait to ride it around all the time.

good grief, i just can't stop smiling 

just thinking about it.

aren't you excited?!

yours truly,

jasmine

book club central

ahhh you have to read
i am intelligent by peyton and dianne goddard.

seriously, people.


it's about this girl who has autism and many other "disabilities."
she had no body control, nor was she able to speak for 21 years.
doctors couldn't really do much for her and she pretty much just had crazy outbursts and did really wacky and outrageous things.

but at 22, she was introduced to a doctor that changed everything. she was given this machine (called--facilitated communication/FC) where you can type with one finger into a computer of sorts.
she typed: i am intelligent.


the entire life of this woman was spent being viewed by others as severely disabled, and pretty much completely neglected (aside from her incredible parents/family). she was the "crazy girl" that everyone stares at and turns their head from.

little did ANYBODY know that she was completely aware of everything going on around her for 21 years. she understood everything people said, did, and the way they acted around her. she IS intelligent. and has the most brilliant mind. she is able to recount her life now that she has this machine. the way she speaks/writes is brilliantly poetic, and i just want to hang all of her quotes on my wall.

i'm not even done with this book, but i already know that everyone needs to read it. i don't know if you'll enjoy it as much as me, but i don't know how you couldn't.

this is exactly why i want to be a teacher. this is exactly why i want to teach "special needs." quite frankly, i believe the children/people we categorize into being "special needs" are really able to teach us how to be better, more compassionate, more understanding, more loving, more accepting, more genuine people.


and that's how i see it.



yours truly,
jasmine

owww-ee

i have one of those underground, cyst/zit things on my cheek.
and it looks like i was attacked by an insect with poisonous venom
or something like that.

make it go away.


also, sweet tooth fairy cupcakes are to diiiiiiiiiiiie for. they just are.

yours truly,
jasmine

good times for everyone

i have a couple stories.

first off,

i got this great little letter from victoria secret...

which i almost considered catalogue junk mail

until i saw that there was a gift card for a free pair of undies.

too much info?

nope.

obviously,

i rushed to the nearest mall

in my grungy-loungy clothes 

AND ALL.

i just couldn't miss this deal.

so.

i get there, and pick out the cutest pair of leftover uglies.

i'm telling you, there were not very good options.

but hey.....can't pass up a deal.

and nothing screams "deal" more than 

FREE!

completely free, no purchase necessary.

well...great.

so i get in line.

and this woman comes up to me with her arms overflowing with merchandise.

she asks me if i'm in line,

to which i respond

YES, but i only have one thing, so it won't take long :)

(the smile really was inserted, so i couldn't leave it out of the story)

next thing i know, she is standing in front of me?

wait....okay, what?

i mean, the funny thing is that i really don't care that she's cutting in front of me.

i'm not mean like that.

what i found strange, was that she asked me straight up if i was in line, 

and then cut in front?

so i thought maybe she was just hanging out near the lip gloss sample bins.

and then the cashier goes....okay i can help who is next.

and she boldly runs to the counter.

ummmm

did anyone else see that!?

i could not wipe the confused look off of my face, and believe me

i tried.

the nerve of some people.

and my next story goes a little something like this.

i decided to be bold and flirty

with this guy.

only to be awkwardly told he had a serious girlfriend.

like almost fiance status.

and then i got to listen to my own word-vomit for the next ten minutes.

when all i wanted to do was zip my mouth shut and walk away.

you better believe i made that situation twenty times more awkward than it should have been.

i kept telling myself

"just stop talking...seriously, jasmine....come on....stop NOW."

but i couldn't even control it!

so bad.

awful.

so bad.

and then i flopped on my mom's bed and told her how i really suck

am not the best at dating.
and she was just way too fixated on my word vomit aspect of the story to even
console me.

word vomit, people.

don't ever go there.

yours truly,

jasmine

fitness fail

after work today

i went with my great friend, brooklin

to this place called "pure barre."

people, this place was nuts.

i went to take this barre pilates class,

as it was free for first timers.

i. wanted. to die.

i almost did.

my entire body was literally a wobbly, jiggly mess.

i was shaking UNCONTROLLABLY

i tell you, uncontrollably.

i was dripping sweat that even a towel couldn't fix.

it was bad.

but,

i feel like my body was instantly changed.

my muscles feel different.

everything feels different 

(it could just be the stage of pain i'm in).

but for reals.

the whole car-ride home

brooklin and i were going back and forth about 

being so happy to never step foot in that place again,

or going back every, single day.

due to the fact that each class is $20 i don't have,

i'll take a wild guess i'll never be back.

ohhhhh but if i did.....i'd have a rockin' bod.

yours truly,

jasmine

you probably won't even understand my ramble

"Every girl is expected to have caucasian blue eyes, full Spanish lips, a classic button nose, hairless Asian skin with a California tan, a Jamaican dance hall butt, long Swedish legs, small Japanese feet, the abs of a lesbian gym owner, the hips of a nine-year-old boy, and the arms of Michelle Obama. The only person close to actually achieving this look is Kim Kardashian, who, as we know, was made by Russian scientists to sabotage our athletes. Everyone else is struggling." - Tina Fey






i'm thinking this is brilliantly worded. isn't it true? isn't it amazing that society does this? isn't it amazing that "society" is really.......just......us....? i mean really. think about it......."society." who even is society?! it's US. we as human beings tell ourselves what we want and need. society says we need the new trends? we say we need the new trends. it's really just a bunch of ONE PERSON saying they need to look a certain way. a bunch of single people make up society. to me, that's amazing. we have the power to dismiss trends. when no one wears a certain style, it goes away. when no one wants to use a certain computer, they stop making it. when people think they need to look a certain way, it becomes magnified and the products to help you achieve that look are sold. 


i'm guilty of thinking i need to look a certain way. don't get me wrong, i'm confident (80% of the time). but i go to the gym to get leaner legs, a flatter tummy, and michelle obama arms (none of this is ever achieved, but a girl can dream). i wear makeup to make my eyes prettier, my lips plumper, and so forth.  i'm fully guilty, and i'll admit it. but who says i have to look like that? who says i can't be fat and not wear makeup? 
you do? you tell me that? 
or do I tell myself that because I think you're telling ME that? in a way you are. YOU are telling me how to look. i'm just choosing to listen....to a point.





the concept of our "society" will always baffle me. i'm rambling because i have thoughts racing a thousand miles a minute and i can't type fast enough to capture them before they're lost. i hope you understand the point i'm trying to make. 








what is the point? i really don't know. 




as tina fey puts it..... i'm struggling.




yours truly,
jasmine

do ya? do ya? do ya?

do you like my new lipstick/gloss?

please tell me you like it.
the lady at the bank did.... does that mean it's good?
it's hard to tell these days.


so tell me....fellow lipstick wearers? (i'm new to the lipstick thing).
how do you go about drinking from cups and not leaving residue? or being 100% sure there are no lipstick marks on your teeth when you awkwardly smile at the lady talking to you? i need to know.


yours truly,
jasmine