cray cray over here

everyone's sick of hearing my whine about waiting for my mission call to arrive.....and i would be annoyed, too.
i AM annoyed of myself...but there's nothing i can do because i have to live with myself every day.
i keep trying to tune myself out, but it's not working.
i just keep annoying myself!

i'm annoyed because today was freaking veteran's day (which i thought was yesterday, due to an overwhelming amount of facebook status' about veterans....whom i love. and appreciate. and respect.) but apparently, it was today. the mail wasn't delivered...which means the postal service will be a day behind? which means that i may have to wait a day longer than planned to get my big envelope in the mail?!
let me tell you, i can't function like a normal human being under this pressure.
you should have seen me today.
i stayed in my jammies, in my bed, with my laptop, and googled everything relating to missions ALL DAY.
youtubing mission call openings, looking up all 347 missions that are currently open (thanks to my dad who feeds my weaknesses....he decided to email me a list of all missions.....he knew i would be obsessively stalking them already).
you can say it's been pretty pathetic.
it is pathetic.
it's not normal, i'm pretty sure?
and i'm sorry that nothing else is circulating through my head.
i'm sorry that nothing else is coming out of my mouth.
i'm sorry, okay!?
i wish there was a pill i could take to shut me up.
i wish there was something i could do to make me not think about it.
i wish there was a way i could transport mail FASTER.
i wish!!!!!!!
i'm going crazy. it's crazy that i will be sent somewhere in the world, just like that, to serve and live for a year and a half!
i have no idea where i'm going, and when i'll leave. would you be a little anxious, too?
probably not.




yours truly,
jasmine